When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. What if life hands you a bucket of battery acid? Surely there is no refreshing drink that can be made from that. I think the only thing you can do in that situation is drink it and hope it kills you quickly. But life isn't always that simple, not when the battery acid is actually a metaphor for all of your hopes and dreams being crushed and your boss being an evil nut-job who's goal in life is to keep you in emotional turmoil.
Perhaps "suicidal" is too strong a word. I don't really want to kill myself. Sometimes I just wish I could wake up and discover that I am a whole new person with a completely different life. Perhaps if I were a Buddhist and believed in re-incarnation that dying would be a great option. However I think Buddhism is just an excuse for people to fat and sit around daydreaming... sorry i mean "meditating" for days on end.
The bottom line is: My Life Is A Pile Of Crap Today.
My boss is evil and if she sacks me tomorrow I'm sure I'll feel happy to be free from her.
This may seem irrelevant to my regrets theme, so allow me to explain. One of my biggest regrets in life was 2 years ago when i dropped out of school and went to work for for The Dragon Woman. I missed my chance to take my exams and now find myself stuck in a a job I hate, in a town I hate with seemingly no means of escape. This was not something I thought I would regret at the time, the sense of freedom I got walking out of school was so intense I thought it would last forever. I didn't realise, of course, that 2 years on I would find myself trapped in an equally suffocating environment, one which would be a lot more difficult to walk away from.
Now I have a headache.
The only thing to do in these situations is go to sleep and hope that tomorrow will be better... or some crap like that.
Goodnight my non-existent pallies out there in Bloggerland!
Love always,
Sleepless.
xxxx
Friday, 23 September 2011
Monday, 19 September 2011
Regrets
There are three types of regrets in life.
The first are The Obvious Regrets, fairly self-explanatory, these are the things that you regret before you even do them but you decide to do them anyway. Stupid things like deciding to get drunk and sleep with the biggest asshole you know because you've just been dumped and that's what people do when they've been dumped.
The second are The Later Regrets, these are the things that happen organically and seem like a good idea at the time, but half way through you start to think "I am so going to regret this later". Like sleeping with your best friend because you are both horny and haven't been in relationships for a while and just crave the feeling of falling asleep in someone's arms. You do these things despite that voice in your head because they feel so good at the time. Even though you have to sneak out the next morning because you know it will be awkward waking up beside the guy/girl who knows all of your secrets and who you don't find remotely attractive because you've known them your entire life.
And the third are the sneaky ones- The Hindsight Regrets, these are the hardest to explain, they are the things that happen in your life that you thought you would never regret, moments that seemed so perfect, until one day, maybe years later, you look back and see that they are really the cause of all the bad things that have happened in your life that have caused you regret. Like losing your virginity to your first real boyfriend, because you were so in love and thought that you would be together forever. But then he dumps you and you get drunk and sleep with assholes and get a reputation you can't shake, so no one wants to be in a relation with you, and you end up alone for years and you can't sleep at night because you're lonely, so you sleep with your best friend because you need company. And at the end of the day you find yourself looking back with nothing but hurt and regret because you are alone, texting a guy who sees you as nothing more than a booty call, thinking about the friend who you barely speak to anymore because it's just too weird and wondering how something so perfect could cause so much trouble.
I am Sleepless In Solitude, and i want to tell you of my regrets.
The first are The Obvious Regrets, fairly self-explanatory, these are the things that you regret before you even do them but you decide to do them anyway. Stupid things like deciding to get drunk and sleep with the biggest asshole you know because you've just been dumped and that's what people do when they've been dumped.
The second are The Later Regrets, these are the things that happen organically and seem like a good idea at the time, but half way through you start to think "I am so going to regret this later". Like sleeping with your best friend because you are both horny and haven't been in relationships for a while and just crave the feeling of falling asleep in someone's arms. You do these things despite that voice in your head because they feel so good at the time. Even though you have to sneak out the next morning because you know it will be awkward waking up beside the guy/girl who knows all of your secrets and who you don't find remotely attractive because you've known them your entire life.
And the third are the sneaky ones- The Hindsight Regrets, these are the hardest to explain, they are the things that happen in your life that you thought you would never regret, moments that seemed so perfect, until one day, maybe years later, you look back and see that they are really the cause of all the bad things that have happened in your life that have caused you regret. Like losing your virginity to your first real boyfriend, because you were so in love and thought that you would be together forever. But then he dumps you and you get drunk and sleep with assholes and get a reputation you can't shake, so no one wants to be in a relation with you, and you end up alone for years and you can't sleep at night because you're lonely, so you sleep with your best friend because you need company. And at the end of the day you find yourself looking back with nothing but hurt and regret because you are alone, texting a guy who sees you as nothing more than a booty call, thinking about the friend who you barely speak to anymore because it's just too weird and wondering how something so perfect could cause so much trouble.
I am Sleepless In Solitude, and i want to tell you of my regrets.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)